Insecurities
by madame.alexandra
Summary: Is she cheating? Scott watches Jean and Logan; he questions and then he comes to the inevitable conclusion.


_**I just wanted to take a break from my regular story and get some of the ideas swirling around in my head out. This one wouldn't leave me alone, so I hope you like it!!**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, Blah blah blah…**_

* * *

_Is she cheating on me?_

Scott folded his arms tightly across his chest, watching the rest of the X-men frolicking in the snow like children. The first snow of the season was always a day when the teachers cancelled classes and the entire mansion went out to enjoy the snow.

The younger children were trying their luck on the ice, slipping around like Bambi when Thumper was teaching him to slide on ice. Bobby had graciously frozen the ice for them, making sure it was completely solid so no accidents would occur. They looked like they were having fun; laughing and joking and shoving each other around. They probably didn't know they were always being watched, always being evaluated to see who would be given and opportunity to be come an X-man. They were still young and innocent enough to have fun in the snow and not worry about politics or war or if they would even be alive the next day. They just existed and enjoyed the sparkling white winter wonderland.

Scott looked away, unable to watch them. He kicked at a rock with his toe and watched Kitty, Rogue and Jubilee peg snowballs at the guys, shrieking and giggling when Peter and Bobby pegged them back ten times as hard.

"Don't you know it's against the rules to hit a girl?" shrieked Jubes, ducking behind a tree.

"Who's rules?" Bobby asked, firing off another snowball. The girls dived out of the way, covered in powdery snow, and laughing.

Scott watched Peter sneak up on Kitty and sprinkle a handful of snow on her head. She laughed and turned around, wiggling he red nose at him. He bent down and kissed her, lingering only for a moment before Jubilee broke them up by shaking the tree branch.

Their love was so innocent, so unaware of the world. They were a fresh couple, still rooted in the beliefs that everything in love went right all the time, no matter if a war was raging or the world was slowly changing for the worse.

Last, Scott lifted his head to Jean.

She seemed to be enjoying herself, half supervising the kids while she chatted with Ororo and Moira. Scott knew winter was her favorite season. Jean loved the snow, she said it was the only thing in the world that humans could never change: It would always be cold and beautiful. Jean was laughing, and she kept shivering and tossing her mane of russet hair back over her shoulder.

_Is she cheating on me?_

The question plagued him. He swore it was the only thing he ever though about now. Every time she spoke to Logan he watched, thinking maybe she was just a little to open with him…a little more amiable and warm than she used to be. When his arm brushed hers, he though he had lingered just a little too long.

And then there was the smile.

The kind of indulgent, turn-up-at-the-corners half smile that always played on her lips when he hit on her in passing, or made some smart comment about how beautiful she looked.

She never stopped him, never took offense, just half-smiled and acted as if she was ignoring him until he moved on to some other subject, some subject that didn't revolve around her body or her clothing.

And he seemed to catch them alone more often now than he used too. He would walk into the kitchen at night, right before he usually started grading papers, and find him flirting shamelessly with her while she read a magazine, or drank her nightly coffee.

It infuriated him, though he never said a word. Saying something to Jean would be like saying he didn't trust her…though he wasn't sure if he did. If she wasn't cheating on him, she would hate him for insinuating that she would, she would be so offended, so angry at him for even thinking she would be so unfaithful. And he didn't want to ruin something wonderful.

But if she _was_…well, did he even really want to know? Wouldn't he rather just go on like this, having her, having the right to say "Yeah, that's my girl"?

No, he wasn't sure he wanted to know the truth at all.

Jean's familiar shriek jolted him out of his thoughts.

He looked up to see her, along with the other women, covered in inches of snow.

Logan had snuck up and shaken a tree branch, causing snow to be dumped all over Ororo, Moira, and Jean.

"LOGAN!" screamed Ororo, shivering and shaking her fist furiously.

"YOU BASTARD!" Moira added, angrily.

Jean responded with a snowball that hit Logan smack in the side of the face. Ororo and Moira cheered and Jean took a bow, grinning.

She looked so beautiful, covered in snow, her cheeks red and sparkling with the cold.

Scott couldn't bear to think about losing her.

"Jean! WATCH-"

Ororo was too late. Logan hit Jean in the side of the face with a huge snowball.

"Get him, Jean!" Moira encouraged, packing a snowball herself.

Jean gathered up another pile of snow and prepared to fire, but Logan was too quick. He dove at her feet, grabbing her around the ankles, and sent them both tumbling into the snow, sprawled over each other in a rather unseemly way. Moira and Ororo laughed, and threw their snowballs at the both of them, while Jean started beating Logan with her snow hat.

"You-should-know-better!" she chided, giggling as she hit him. He threw her off him effortlessly, only to be pinned back down my Moira and Ororo.

"Bring us some snow, Jean!" they ordered, starting to pile it on him in large amounts. Logan growled and gnashed his teeth playfully.

If he really wanted to get up, he would.

Scott watched silently…and a bit sadly. They seemed to comfortable, too familiar with each other. A year ago Jean and Logan had barely said a word to each other outside of battles and polite conversation. Now they seemed the best of friends. Maybe it was because Logan had opened up a bit more, settled down a bit more. Because he was more friendly.

Or maybe it was another reason.

Jean knelt down next to Logan and threw a bunch of snow on his stomach.

"Aren't you cold?"

she asked, gesturing to his lack of snow clothes.

"Not with you around, Darlin'."

He quipped slyly, blowing in her face.

There was that indulgent smile again. She said nothing, just threw another pile of snow on him.

Scott hated it. He hated how she just let him go on. It was like…encouragement. He hated the feeling of being out of the loop, of not knowing something.

"LOGAN!" shrieked Jean, her face flushing red. She swatted his hand away from her thigh and threw and extra-generous pile of snow on his face.

"Shame on you!"

She didn't seem to mean it though. She said it lightly, barely got angry, and Scott swore he saw a hint of that little smile that said so much.

He sensed that he was losing her, but refused to acknowledge it. He saw the subtle change in her behavior towards Logan, her indulgence of his flirtations and idiosyncrasies drove him mad with confusion and anger.

_Is she cheating on me?_

He was losing the woman he loved to the man he hated.

_Am I sure? Is she really cheating?_

He looked at them again, watching how bright and happy she looked, dumping snow all over Logan, and how Logan just smiled indulgently and occasionally growled an empty threat.

Then Ororo turned. She looked at him fleetingly, so quickly, he almost didn't catch it, but in the look he caught…he caught everything.

She looked torn, sad…like she felt pity. She looked a bit heartbroken, a bit upset, and a bit like she was having to choose between two of her oldest friends.

And Scott knew.

_She's cheating on me._

* * *

_**Well, how did ya'll like it? I'm glad I got that outta my head. My friends and I were chatting about how Scott wasn't a bad guy and all, he was just a bit of a wimp who's bad for Jean and who has an arrogant/attitude problem. We started to feel kinda sorry for him, so I wrote a ficlet where he isn't such an asshole.**_

_**Not that I don't still think he's a bit of an asshole.**_


End file.
